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When I was growing up, we imagined a future where bipedal humanoid robots did our bidding. Science fiction writers envisioned robots that could walk, talk and think – but few conceived of a future where everyone carried a supercomputer in their pocket. But instead of C-3PO and Rosie, we today have Roomba. A squat vacuum cleaner that sucks up our mess before retreating to a charger to brood about its thankless existence. Only not the brooding part. Because it’s a robot. But that might be about to change, if Apple robots become the norm.
OK, so Apple’s robots might not mope. Apple SulkBot is unlikely to be a big seller or something that will better the world. But Apple did recently drop a research paper hinting that giving robots a dash of humanity could be good for us all. (And also inject a little joy into a soul-crushing world of sterile tech.) If you want to have a read, the entire thing is online as Expressive and Functional Movement Design for Non-Anthropomorphic Robot. Catchy. And if you don’t fancy reading, at least watch the video. Trust me.
We are programmed just to do…
So what is Apple’s big idea? Mostly that robots don’t have to be cold, calculating automatons. Sure, they can respond to user requests with straight-line hyper-efficiency. But that’s alien and rigid. Apple’s preferred path is to programme robots to act more human, with expressive moments that mimic our own interactions. Which might sound a lot like those humanoid robots I mentioned earlier – but Apple’s suggesting even non-anthropomorphic forms get in on the action.
Basically, Apple R&D just made Luxo Jr. While Boston Dynamics is busy building Terminator prototypes and other companies spend millions chasing the dream of sci-fi robots (and conquering stairs), Apple brought a lamp to life. And it’s adorable. The lamp flinches when you get too close, nudges your water glass towards you when you’re parched. It’ll visibly strain to reach a target and glumly shake its little lamp head if it fails. The thing even looks out of the window before delivering a weather report, and bops along to music when its owner is suitably energised. The whole thing feels like a Pixar short come to life.
Anything you want us to…
Watching the video reminded me of my short time with Anki Cozmo, which also looked an awful lot like it had fallen out of an animated movie. That palm-sized robot resembled a mix of WALL·E and a forklift. And it was packed with character and personality, tackling every task with the boundless enthusiasm of a puppy. However, Apple has taken things a step further. And that’s because, unlike Cozmo’s ‘actually clearly a robot’ gadget, Apple has achieved the same with – I remind you – a lamp.
Do we want all our gadgets to act this way? Probably not. I’m not ready for my fridge to start headbanging when I put a CD on, or for my speakers to take a leaf out of the Apple R&D video and start nudging glasses of water my way. But there’s something to this, if Apple gets the balance right. After all, Siri has personality, but it lacks utility. It masks failure with jokes, which makes Apple’s assistant feel even more artificial and dead than a simpler treatment would have done. Tech needs personality and smarts. But I’ll forgive Apple for every Siri issue and all its other smart home nonsense if, alongside the iPhone 17, I can buy my own personal Luxo Jr.
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